Are you kissing a fool? Is the person on the other side of your lips worthy of your attentions? Teen Advive helps you decide if the person you are kissing is cool or a fool. Figure it out with these 15 warning signs, answer "yes" to 10 or more and your kissing partner may not be all that s/he seems.

 

WAYS TO STOP CUTTING:

Do you want to stop cutting? Things don't always have to seem so bleak and if you are ready to stop, there are ways to get through. These are some techniques that I found helpful and I know others have too. They do not work for everyone so please don't feel discouraged if they don't. Nevertheless, tThey are good suggestions.

1) Write in a "feeling" journal:
            Write down all of your feelings and closing the book. This technique allows you to get
            everything out of your head and move on from those feelings.

2) Snapping an Elastic Band:
            Put an elastic band around your wrist and snap it every time you have the urge to cut.
            When those urges begin to lessen, stop using the band.

3) Physical Exercise:
            Getting out your feelings through exercise not only helps you get exercise but it really does release a lot of
            tension or feelings you are having. Activities like kickboxing, running, and aerobics are good.

4) Be Creative:
            Write, take pictures, paint, draw, or compose music: these are all great ways to release frustrations
             and be creative at the same time.

5) Get Mad:
            Punch or scream into a pillow, scream or yell: these are a great way to release anger while not hurting yourself.

6) Talk:
            Talk to others about what is happening in your life. You can and should talk to other people.
            You could talk to your friends or family.

If you are really interested in stopping your self-harm and making a change in your life, the most important thing to do is to talk to a counselor. Self-harm is a method of coping in which you deal with pain from the inside and transfer it. If you are interested in change, there are many ways to get help. Visit your local school's counseling office or your family doctor can access counselors in your area that deal with self-harm. I realize that you may be sitting there thinking, oh no not a therapist! However counseling is not as bad as people think it is. It is a great way of release and support in dealing with problems. It can be great to have another person's opinion of a particular situation that you can't handle on your own.

You don't have to do this on your own because there are people around you that can adn will help. If you're ready, take the first step and talk to your parents, friends, teachers and get help. Things will improve but it takes effort. Healing is a process that takes time and it is worth it.

Here's the problem... I went out with this guy Alex for about a year and a half and I broke up with him almost 3 months or so ago. Give or take a couple weeks. But he for some reason wont leave me alone. I tried to sever all ties with him but thats pratically impossible. I have friends that go to school with him and people that I know hang out with him. It doesn't matter to me at all what he does or who he hangs out with but for some reason he finds 10min out of his day to anoy and pester me. He IM's me and just says some very mean stuff at times. He threatens me and say's things to an extent of "Im going to smack the taste out of your mouth bitch" -less intellegently though. But he just all around wont leave me alone. He tries to make me jealous sometimes by talking about other girls... I don't even care about that stuff. What would be the best way to end this dilemma? Any help.
    Block his emails & IM's. If after telling him no, he continues, file a police report for harassment, intimidation, and threats. I'd consider seeing a counselor too to help you grow from this
and move on.....

my gf is going on a school rafting trip, and is spending the night before with one of my friends, who's also invited a dozen guys to spend the night before rafting. she'll be the only girl there...and i'm very unnerved. i know i can't tell her what to do...but is this something i should bring up? i don't really know any of the guys other than my friend (he's her friend too). do i have any right to take this badly?, and if so...what can i do?
   Well, how close are you? Is your friend and his even closer? If the answer to any part is yes, I would be concerned. Even if it is no, I'd be concerned, and not to mention jealous. Why don't you spend the night too? It's all about trust. It appears to me that she would be uncomfortable in this situation. How does she feel? obviously you don't trust her. if you did, you wouldn't even be having these thoughts. Just talk to her about it, lacing your worries with a bit of humour to soften the feelings of mistrust. Personally I just don't think its appropriate to spend the night with the opposite sex if you're in a relationship. Unless you're girlfriend or boyfriend is there of course. I think you should talk to her about it. Ask her how she would feel if it was the other way around. it is okay to feel jealous. trust her. i would go nuts. you trust her, but you are just jealous you can't be spending the night with her. dont worry, she'll come back in one piece, and not have done anything with them.

hey, im sort of directing this question to other girls but anyway... sometimes i really can't stand some guys because they make you feel like youre just some sex object. and i feel disgusting when i see a guy like staring at me in that gross leering sort of way. i want to be able to wear the clothes that make me look good, but i find i always just attract bad attention and guys who are pretty much egotistical jackasses. how do i deal with this kind of thing?
   It's just how life is. Good and bad. that's kinda how it goes.... you wear clothes that make you look good, and people want to look at someone who looks good.. only way you can reverse it is to make yourself look nasty/disgusting. There literally is nothing you can do about it. It is how guys are programmed. The sooner you learn to use that to *your*advantage, rather than let it bother you, the better off you'll be. If you can harness that power, you will OWN! Wear stuff that covers more skin.

Ok there's a guy on my bus who goes to a different school and he's always meen to me and another girl who's a bit slow.Also he curses constantly and that offends the grade school kids on the bus. (i'm a junior) Dispite we got into a huge arguement today. I never yell, freak out etc. He kept making attacks on me and made a dirty joke about my faith. It was near my stop and after i got off the bus i had a panic attack. (I suffer from them, it was the worst i had ever had) Also I couldn't stop crying for 3 hours. I had a class and cried through half of that. I still start crying everyone once in awhile now. I'm in pain. He kept saying I should kill myself, and made fun of my clothes, and talked about how I have no boyfriend and never will. All three are really touchy subjects....essp the last one. I'm in ALOT of pain right now. My dad took care of calling the bus people, etc. but what can I do/pray/think. I feel so lonely and terriable. Thankx for the help.
   You have allowed him to win by over reacting to his assault. Weak people love to put down others. It makes them feel more important, stronger and smarter. Unfortunately you fell right into his plan. You would have been more successful by laughing at him. That would have done the same to him that he did to you......infuriate and intimidate him. Words are only words.....don't let them get to you. Always do the opposite of what they want you to do. Report the jerk to the school. whenever someones being a bit of a dick towards me i just say " ha thats what you think" after everything they say, and it usually really annoys or confuses them. I know its hard but if you let people see that there getting to you then that means they got the reaction out of you that they wanted. If this continues and it gets to the point were you just can't handle it anymore then tell the school that he's harrassing you. I know you may get called a tattle tail, but thats better then putting up with that shit day after day.

I have a little bit of a problem. All the time i complain about stupid little things and i obsess and worry about everything. I take so long to make desicions because i think if it will be the best thing to do in the long run. I never take chances and never just let go. Inside i am a colorful person who just wants to let go and have fun but i always worry about what others think of me and what i do. i can never seem to be happy with myself. i'm always worrying about my body, my (non-existant) love life, what friends are thinking about me, what people think of me and tons of other things. Am i crazy or is this just normal, cause it certianly doesn't seem normal to me. I mean i imagine it is normal but i can never seem to just let go and go with the flow of life. Anyone have any advice that might help me loosen up a little?
   well, i can't help you with your probem, but i can tell you that you are not the only one like this it is normal for some people. You're going to make a fool of yourself sometimes, you're gonna make mistakes and you're gonna get blown off by people sometimes, that's all part of it. But the more mistakes you make, and the more times you make a fool of yourself, the more you'll learn about what to do and what not to do until you get to the point where you can just hang out and let loose but still know where to draw the line. Obviously you still have to use common sense, but worrying and over anaylizing every action you take in public doesn't teach you much of anything, because you'll be spending all your time thinking, and you can't know for sure how people will react to things. You spend all your time assuming what might happen based on no experience at all. Besides, unless you pull something really offensive most people will just forget about mistakes you make altogether. Basically, the more you let loose the easier it will be to know what to do in the future without thinking about it for hours before hand. There is nothing wrong with something like that every now and then, but when it affects your daily living (which it seems like it is here), then there is a problem. Counseling may be your best option.

ok a while ago my bo friend started abusing me be htiting, and slapping me because i wouldnt have sex with him and he would hit me if i ever told anyone about it even now that i dont talk to him and its been a few weeks since the last time that it happend (the last time i saw him) i still have flash backs of it all the time and my friends say that theres something wrong all the time because only one of my friends nows that it happend and my new boyfriend now and i'm afraid to even be near any guys but i liked the guy i just dont wanna be arond any... everytime a guy jokes around with me i get flash backs and i never sleep anymore any ideas on how to make them go away...???
   I'm so sorry. You should definetly attend one of those abuse victim meetings and get treatment. No one should have to endure that, and especially the trauma that follows. You have to be strong and get help for it. You should immediately split up with him. Stop being his girlfriend. Abuse like that always escalates and you should get out whilst you can. He has never any right to hit you or to make you have sex, or to do anything else you don't want to do. Although you might still like him, this guy is somebody you should just avoid totally. He will only end up hurting you further. Don't believe any apologies he might say about how he didn't mean to do it or that he will never do it again. He will. Some day in the future, you will be hit again, or worse. So, if you choose to break up with him: make sure you tell him in a public place where he cannot hurt you. Abuse is all about control and some abusers will do anything to stop their victim from leaving - including threats of suicide. Please get out of this relationship as fast as you can. Like I said, abuse always gets worse, and it could result in you being seriously injured or even killed if you remain his girlfriend. What he did to you just proves he's a sad excuse for a man. Most men know not to hit a woman but the ones who do hit girls are pitiful. I don't care if it's a generalization, it's the truth. Besides that, good for you for breaking up with him! He didn't deserve you, or any girl for that matter, anyway. Now you have a new boyfriend you said? And he knows everything? If not, that's your first step to recovery. Get everything out. Don't be afraid to tell people about what happened to you, even in detail, because that will help you cope. Especially if you're close with your new boyfriend, him knowing of how you feel due to the previous shit that went on in your old relationship will allow you two to become much closer and you'll feel safer around him. You shouldn't have to NOT feel safe, he's a different guy and not like your old boyfriend. Don't be afraid to open up! Going to an abuse victim meeting is your best bet, you'll be surprised at how many young girls go through what you do, so you don't have to go through this trauma alone!

Do guys Get Turned off by clingy girls? LIke the ones who call them daily? Please write your comments.
   If she calls daily and there's substance to the conversation -- cool. If she calls to call and spy on me -- no!!

Just recently, i have had this crush on my best friend. However, it started just before i found out that this other girl liked him. I guess we could call her my "frien-emy". Anyways, people keep telling me "oh Sandy (the frien-emy) and Jeff (my best friend) would never go together. In fact, if i had to pick someone for Jeff, it would be you" and "I have always thought that you and Jeff would end up together" and "I know that you and Jeff will end up together.'" and since those comments have been made by our friends, i've been thinking a lot and well... maybe Jeff and i are supposed to be together but i just don't know.. We're basically the same person, we like the same things and love the same music. I couldn't think of a person who is more like me. But am i only thinking of us this way because of Sandy? Because she likes him am i now kicking into "competiiton mode"?
   well maybe u might be getting jelious that if he and sandy go out he may not have time for u any more or maybe u realy do like him and it toook the other chick for them to kick in i think u should tell umm what was his name oh yeah jeff that u like him he may feel the same.If you are going to competition mode, don't get too competitive. Date him because you like him and want to build on what you have
NOT because your friends think you should because Sany wants him. Nor would I wait and be a rebound relationship. Think of the pros and cons of you dating and go from there....... If you decide to go for it and he's with Sandy, support them and let him relax a bit after they break up (if they do) and take it slow with him.

How To Find Out if You're Pregnant
Home Pregnancy Test:

Shortly after the embryo implants, it begins producing the hormone human chorionic gonadotropin (hCG). hCG builds up quickly in the first few days after implantation. This is what the Pregnancy Tests use to determine whether youare pregnant or not.

A home pregnancy test measures the presence of hCG in your urine. Not all pregnancy tests are the same , some are more sensitive than others, so some may detect pregnancy earlier than others.

Pregnancy tests can usually detect hCG 8-11 days after ovulation, thats a couple of days before your period is due. This depends on the sensitivity of the test. It should say on the test when it should be used and how sensitive it is.

Most home PG tests are 97% accurate, as long as the directions are followed exactly. However, your test could be negative for a number of reasons:

1. You may not be pregnant.

2. If you test too early, there may not be enough hCG for the test to detect.

3. You may be making less amounts of hCG than normal.

If a test comes back negative but you suspect you are pregnant, try another test in a few days. Tests which report positively and are incorrect are rare. Using the first urine of the morning will improve your chances of getting the most accurate reading.

Blood Tests:

Go to your physician. There, blood will be drawn from you to determine whether or not you are pregnant. This is the most accurate of all tests.

I like a lot of guys, and some of them want to date me. I really like guys, I just don't know if it would be fair to them if we dated and stuff and I still liked other guys, and maybe found someone who I liked better. I hate hurting people's feelings, I do anything I can to avoid it. What would any of ya'll recommend?
   Just be honest about it. Tell each of your dates that right now your still looking for something special but your not looking to get serious until you figure out what it is your really looking for in a guy.